The Only Constant

Puffballs and Whirling Blades of Death

by Solanjey, Chaos Sorcerer and Snappy Dresser

So what happened next? Usually, I’m the last person to ask about goings on, since much of what I see is only happening to me, and sometimes it really isn’t. But someone’s got to keep track of these things, and far be it from me to be a grumpy goose.

Mushrooms! A whole room of them. And not the fun kind, either. Too big for a magic stew, and what was more, Adar said that they were definitely poisonous. We had to get past them. At first, we tried climbing along the slimy wall, but that didn’t work very well. I may be a little more athletic than I used to be (for some reason) but I’m still not the best at that sort of thing.

So we slid to the floor. The mushrooms shook, and some of them burst when we tried to move through them. Poison spores! What will those wacky mushrooms think of next? I bet it’ll have something to do with hats.

Then I realized that I could turn into water, so I did it. I oozed through the mushroom fields, Patryn turned into bugs, and Adar and Theork somehow got through the rest without hurting themselves too badly.

Up ahead, there was a crack in the ground. Or maybe I should say a fissure. Even though we were not sure about heading even further down, Theork laughingly assured us that this is where we wanted to go. I wasn’t sure what he was so amused by, but I guess orcs have a lot to laugh about. Or at least he did, before he got shredded. But that part’s coming next.

We ended up in a long hallway with clickey plates in the floor. Theork said he knew which clicks not to click, but before he could get us all the way across, a big glowing hole opened up in the ceiling and a dwarf fell out. “Sorry!” said a voice. Not sure what that was all about.

The dwarf was named Dain, and even though he had just been in a pub, drinking ale with his friend, he was very enthusiastic about the prospect of tromping through a smelly sewer with us, killing little lizard people and getting caught in traps. And everyone says that I’m the one who’s crazy!

No, really, they do. A lot.

We barely had time to talk to Dain before everything got dangerous again. A few dead orcs not only attacked us, but they also set off the clickey traps. Talk about careless. So now we had a whirling column of blades bouncing around the hallway, too. Luckily, we managed to prevail against it all (though Theork didn’t; see above) and we moved on.

The hallway split, and we headed towards the right, only to enter some kind of altar room with a bunch more cranky kobolds. We fought! And when it was all over, we were left with more dead kobolds and another room to explore. It’d be nice if there was a way to the surface through here…

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